Camp

Just got back from High School camp in Arizona.  If you’ve ever been to camp as a leader, you already know what I am about to say…It’s Hard!!  I wish it was fun and vacation like, as it is for the students.  But as an adult, it’s always work, 24/7.  Maybe something like being a parent, of 19 kids, all in high school, all on no sleep, and on vacation mind!  I’ll let you know when I find out!

There were some beautiful lessons that God had for me though.  That’s one of the great things about God.  He never forgets!  Here I was, thinking that camp would be all about the students and I would just be on pour out mode.  But God had better for me, as always!  He filled my cup when I was feeling empty.  Thank you, Lord.

One of the devotions we had during counselor meetings was about our own feelings of inadequacies.  Hello!  He was talking to me!  And my heart knew it!  I have totally been struggling with feelings of inadequacies and self-doubt.  I question my own abilities, talents and usefulness.  I feel like I’m not worthy of my job, or the confidence that God has placed in me.  Well, this day was for me!  It allowed me to be open and ask for prayer and strength in this mind battle.

The more I live, the more I find that when I speak the silent battles of my mind, I find freedom from those hidden chains.

My other golden lesson…

Love.

I know, so simple, right!  But, when those people drive me crazy, feed on all my inadequacies and insecurities, point out all my mistakes, which by the way, I already KNOW!  What’s the answer?!  Love them…when I’m crying out to God.  I know He’s listening, I know He cares.  And even though I am praying that He will do Justice, and Vengeance, His words to me are to Love them.

A hard lesson.  I know I’ll be learning it forever.  But it was a perfect thing to hear.

Thanks Heavenly Father!